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An Outline of Christian Marriage: Rite
III
Entrance
Sentences of Scripture
Statement on the Gift of Marriage
Prayer
Declarations of Intent
[Affirmation
of the Families]
Affirmation of the Congregation
[Psalm,
Hymn, Spiritual, or Anthem]
Readings from Scripture
Sermon
[Psalm,
Hymn, or Spiritual]
Vows
Prayer
Lord‘s Prayer
Charge and Blessing
[Psalm,
Hymn, Spiritual, or Anthem]
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A
Service for Those Previously Married in a Civil Ceremony
This rite is designed to
allow those who have been previously married in a civil ceremony to make the
promises of Christian marriage before the witness of the church and in the
context of Christian worship. The service may be used independently or, with
the necessary alterations, it may be incorporated into the Service for the
Lord’s Day.
Entrance
At the
appointed time, the couple come and stand before the minister. The families
of the bride and groom may stand with the couple.
During the
entrance of the couple, the people may stand and sing a psalm, hymn, or
spiritual. Or an anthem may be sung, or instrumental music may be played.
Sentences of Scripture
The
minister calls the people to worship either before or after the entrance,
using one of the following, or another appropriate verse from scripture.
1
1 John 4:16
God is love,
and those who abide in love
abide in God,
and God abides in them.
2
Ps. 118:24
This is the day that the
Lord has made;
let us rejoice and be glad in it.
3
Ps. 106:1 and elsewhere
O give thanks, for the
Lord is good.
God‘s love endures forever.
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Statement on the Gift of
Marriage
The
minister says:
N. and N. have been
married according to the law of the state,
and have spoken vows pledging loyalty and love.
Now, in the presence of God and the church,
they come to reaffirm those vows
and in faith to confess their common purpose in the Lord.
We gather to witness their promises to each other,
to surround them with our prayers,
to give thanks to God for the gift of marriage,
and to ask God’s blessing upon them,
so that they may be strengthened for their life together
and nurtured in their love for God.
God created us male and
female,
and gave us marriage
so that husband and wife may help and comfort each other,
living faithfully together in plenty and in want,
in joy and in sorrow,
in sickness and in health,
throughout all their days.
God gave us marriage
for the full expression of the love between a man and a woman.
In marriage a woman and a man belong to each other,
and with affection and tenderness
freely give themselves to each other.
God gave us marriage
for the well-being of human society,
for the ordering of family life,
and for the birth and nurture of children.
God gave us marriage as a
holy mystery
in which a man and a woman are joined together,
and become one,
just as Christ is one with the church.
In marriage, husband and
wife are called to a new way of life,
created, ordered, and blessed by God.
It is to be lived prayerfully, and in joyful obedience to Christ.
We rejoice that marriage
is given by God,
blessed by our Lord Jesus Christ,
and sustained by the Holy Spirit.
Therefore, let marriage be held in honor by all.
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Prayer
The
minister says:
Let us pray:
Gracious God,
you are always faithful in your love for us.
Look mercifully upon N. and N.,
who have come seeking your blessing.
Let your Holy Spirit rest upon them
so that with steadfast love
they may honor the promises they make this day,
through Jesus Christ our Savior.[791]
Amen.
The
congregation may be seated.
Declarations of Intent
The
minister addresses the man and woman individually:
N., you have heard how
God has created, ordered, and blessed the covenant of marriage.
Now in the presence of God and the church,
do you wish to affirm the vows of Christian marriage?
Answer:
I do.
Affirmations of the Families
If
appropriate, the minister may address the families of the bride and groom:
N., N. [Names of
family members],
do you give your blessing to N. and N.,
and promise to do everything in your power to uphold them in their marriage?
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The
families of the bride and groom answer:
1
We (I) give our
(my) blessing
and promise our (my) loving support.
Or
2
We (I) do.
The families of the bride and groom may be
seated.
Affirmation of the
Congregation
The
minister may address the congregation, saying:
Will all of you
witnessing these vows
do everything in your power
to uphold N. and N. in their marriage?
Answer:
We will.
A psalm,
hymn, spiritual, or anthem may be sung.
Readings from Scripture
The
following or a similar prayer for illumination (pp. 60, 90-91) may be said.
God of mercy,
your faithfulness to your covenant
frees us to live together
in the security of your powerful love.
Amid all the changing words of our generation,
speak your eternal Word that does not change.
Then may we respond to your gracious promises
by living in faith and obedience;
through our Lord Jesus Christ.[792]
Amen.
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One or
more scripture passages are read (pp. 893-902).
Sermon
After the
scriptures are read, a brief sermon may be given.
A psalm,
hymn, spiritual, or other music may follow.
Vows
The people
may stand.
The
minister addresses the couple:
N. and N.,
join your right hands,
and in faith make your promises to each other
as husband and wife.
The couple
face each other and join their right hands. They, in turn, then make their
vows to each other, using A or B.
A
The man
says:
N., you are my wife,
and I promise,
before God and these witnesses,
to be your loving and faithful husband;
in plenty and in want;
in joy and in sorrow;
in sickness and in health;
as long as we both shall live.
The woman
says:
N., you are my
husband,
and I promise,
before God and these witnesses,
to be your loving and faithful wife;
in plenty and in want;
in joy and in sorrow;
in sickness and in health;
as long as we both shall live.
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B
The man
says:
N., you are my wife.
Before God and these witnesses,
I promise to love you,
and to be faithful to you,
as long as we both shall live.
The woman
says:
N., you are my husband.
Before God and these witnesses,
I promise to love you,
and to be faithful to you
as long as we both shall live.
Prayer
The couple
may kneel.
One of the following
prayers, or a similar prayer, is said:
Let us pray:
1
Eternal God,
Creator and preserver of all life,
author of salvation
and giver of all grace:
look with favor upon the world you have made and redeemed,
and especially upon N. and N.
Give them wisdom and
devotion in their common life,
that each may be to the other
a strength in need,
a counselor in perplexity,
a comfort in sorrow,
and a companion in joy.
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Grant that their wills
may be so knit together in your will,
and their spirits in your Spirit,
that they may grow in love and peace
with you and each other
all the days of their life.
Give them the grace,
when they hurt each other,
to recognize and confess their fault,
and to seek each other‘s forgiveness
and yours.
Make their life together
a sign of Christ’s love
to this sinful and broken world,
that unity may overcome estrangement,
forgiveness heal guilt,
and joy conquer despair.
Give them such
fulfillment of their mutual love
that they may reach out in concern for others.
[Give to them, if it is
your will,
the gift of children,
and the wisdom to bring them up
to know you, to love you,
and to serve you.]
Grant that all who have
witnessed these vows today
may find their lives strengthened,
and that all who are married
may depart with their own promises renewed.
Enrich with your grace
all husbands and wives, parents and children,
that, loving and supporting one another,
they may serve those in need
and be a sign of your kingdom.
Grant that the bonds by
which all your children
are united to one another
may be so transformed by your Spirit
that your peace and justice may fill the earth,
through Jesus Christ our Lord.[794]
Amen.
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2
Eternal God,
without your grace no promise is sure.
Strengthen N. and N. with patience, kindness, gentleness,
and all other gifts of your Spirit,
so that they may fulfill the vows they have made.
Keep them faithful to each other and to you.
Fill them with such love and joy
that they may build a home of peace and welcome.
Guide them by your Word
to serve you all their days.
Help us all, O God,
to do your will in each of our homes and lives.
Enrich us with your grace
so that, supporting one another,
we may serve those in need
and hasten the coming of peace, love, and justice on earth,
through Jesus Christ our Lord.[795]
Amen.
Lord‘s Prayer
The
minister invites all present to sing or say the Lord’s Prayer.
As our Savior Christ has
taught us, we are bold to say:
All pray
together.
Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
Forgive us our sins
as we forgive those who sin against us.
Save us from the time of trial
and deliver us from evil.
For the kingdom, the power,
and
the glory are yours
now and forever.Amen.
or
Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name,
thy kingdom come,
thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread;
and forgive us our debts,
as we forgive our debtors;
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom,
and the power, and the glory,
forever.Amen.
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The
minister joins the couple‘s right hands.
The
congregation may join the minister, saying:
Those whom God has joined together
let no one separate.
Charge and Blessing
Charge to the Couple
The minister
addresses the couple, using one of the following:
1
See Col. 3:12-14
As God’s own,
clothe yourselves with compassion,
kindness, and patience,
forgiving each other
as the Lord has forgiven you,
and crown all these things with love,
which binds everything together in perfect harmony.
2
Col. 3:17
Whatever you do, in word or deed,
do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus,
giving thanks to God through him.
Blessing
The
minister gives God‘s blessing to the couple and the congregation, using one
of the following:
1
See Num. 6:24-26
The Lord bless you and
keep you.
The Lord be kind and gracious to you.
The Lord look upon you with favor
and give you peace.
Amen.
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2
The grace of Christ
attend you,
the love of God surround you,
the Holy Spirit keep you,
that you may live in faith,
abound in hope,
and grow in love,
both now and forevermore.
Amen.
A psalm,
hymn, spiritual, or anthem may be sung, or instrumental music may be played,
as the wedding party leaves.
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